Self-care is a major topic for parents. Whether you have one, two, or even five children. Taking time for your self is a must. The hustle and bustle of being a parent, employee, and /or entrepreneur mean you are "Hell-a” busy moving through your week for everything and everyone. Taking a little time out for yourself will help you keep calm and not burn out. I have four beautiful children ranging in ages, 15 14, 11, and 8. Finding time for myself is not easy when you have a household full of people. My husband needs time with his wife, the kids need their mom the moment I walk in the door.
Taking small moments to yourself really helps with the stress levels of being a super mom or dad. I will share a few things I do to unwind those stresses of the day.
1. Hit the gym, and work it out
After work, I know you are tired, but pushing yourself to get active for 45 minutes to an hour at the gym will not only help melt that waistline but it will melt the stress and worries of your workday away.
Getting the blood flowing is like a reset button. You would be surprised at how your energy levels shift.
2. Routines for everyone! "You get a routine," "You get a routine," " We all get a routine"
Routines will help you, your husband, and your kids, So they will know what to expect every day, and it eases a lot of the frustrations with keeping the kids organized and ready for the next day.
Once I am home with the kids, they know what to do. Folders on the table, lets talk about the day. Homework, Grades, and Activities. Special dates are marked on our family calendar board. Like an assembly line, as one child is finish with me to the shower and get things ready for the next day. My husband cooks dinner while I take on the kids. That takes about 30 minutes to an one hour to complete with the kids. We eat, and now it's a short mommy break to wash the day away.
How does this help with self care you ask? Well keeping things on a routine helps you know were you can take a few minutes to yourself to take a breath.
3. The last one standing, It's mom time
Now it's my shower /bath time, get that smooth music going. I prefer the soft tones of meditation music, my favorite YouTuber, or hip hop lofi music. I use this time to unwind and wash away the day. Giving myself a short meditation during this time, “which is so bomb during bath”. Put a couple of drops of scented oils in your water and just marinate.
If it's the weekend and I am in a mood, I will throw in some epsom salt, a couple of candles ,some petals of a flower of my choice. Sometimes I will purchase a spiritual bath mix from one of my favorite vendors. Weekends are great for this type of groove because you want to take your time and enjoy, but for a regular day of the week, you may want to stick to your routine that is good on time, and you are still getting the self-care you need.
Somedays, you can't get all of that in your night, and that is ok, but please take a few minutes to yourself and let your family know, "This is mommy’s time."
I have a sign that says, "Mommy is meditating , this is mommy’s time, place your name here." When I'm done, I'll check my door and get with my kids after my time is up."
****If there’s no blood, fire, broken bones or emergencies do not interrupt **
4. You all over your body
Take your time to pamper your body, shave, scrub, hydration mask, lotions, oils, shimmers, and body sprays. The power of touch can relax your body and mind from the day. Your focus can be on oiling your skin and hair. Rubbing fragrant lotions to your skin. Make it an enjoyable experience, the smell, the feel of the lotions and oils going on to your skin, and keep that music going, it’s a continuation of your bath and meditation. Make yourself aware of the moment, the touch and feel of your body and hair as you apply your products.
Try to plan self-care days based on what's going on during the week. Even if it is as simple as slipping on your favorite comfy PJ's and finish the night with family time before the kids head to bed. For me once the kids are to bed, that gives me and my husband 1hr to chill before we go to bed and start the next day.
In those four-steps of your day, carve out a few minutes for you. Even at work I tend to use my lunch break as a time to unwind for the second part of my work day. I use the weekends to catch up on cleaning and hanging with my family, but Friday night is all mine to pamper me for 1 to 2 hours, even if it's getting away to your bedroom to read.
Use the weekend for a longer time to unwind. This helps you stay relaxed and flexible, it all counts, and you will find ways to squeeze things in and spending time with your loved ones. Once again, it's routine, planning, and letting your family know so you can have that time to yourself.
Every family dynamic is different, but one thing that always seems to work for me are those 4 steps. My routine has allowed me to find time for self-care and I wanted to share a little bit about my selfcare steps
In 2020 we are setting time to date ourselves and complete our daily duties.